Respectful Relationships
Every relationship is different, but in a healthy relationship you should feel respected, safe and free to be yourself.
On this page you can learn about what it means to be in a respectful relationship.
Watch the Relationships Australia Victoria video (external website) 'Tips for a Healthy Relationship':
Tip: Click the subtitles button in the bottom right hand corner of the video to turn closed captions on and off.
What is a relationship?
A relationship is a close connection between two or more people.
We all have relationships with our family, friends and co-workers. But when people talk about relationships, they often mean a romantic or intimate relationship between people who are dating, living together or married.
Every relationship is different and different types of relationships can work differently for different people, depending on people's needs and circumstances.
Types of intimate relationships
There are lots of different types of intimate relationships. The most common types are listed below.
Relationships can change over time, and it is ok to move between these types of relationships.
Monogamous relationships
A monogamous relationship is one that involves two people who agree not to have sex or intimate relationships with other people.
Monogamous relationships are the type of relationship people are usually in when they are married or living together and are the most common type of relationship in Australia.
Non-monogamous relationships
Non-monogamy describes any sexual or intimate relationship that isn’t exclusively between two people.
A couple who have an open relationship and give their consent for their partner to have sex with other people, or a couple who are polyamorous and have relationships with other people are examples of non-monogamous relationships.
It’s important to mention that somebody being unfaithful to their partner isn’t non-monogamy – that’s infidelity. For non-monogamy, both partners must agree that this is something they want to participate in, and both feel comfortable with.
Casual sex
Casual sex involves the people involved agreeing to have sex, but that is all. There is no committed romantic relationship on top of this and they are free to see other people.
Gender, sexuality and relationships
All relationships can include people of different genders or the same gender.
The gender of the people you form relationships with depends on your sexuality.
Learn more on the Gender and Sexuality page.
What is a respectful relationship?
In a respectful relationship, the people involved are considerate and kind to each other and accept their partner or partners as they are.
Respect
In a healthy relationship, you should not feel like you have to change yourself, or always put the wants of someone else before your own. Healthy relationships involve respecting each other’s decisions, feelings, thoughts and ideas.
Equity
In any relationship, the people involved should be equally valued. It is not OK for one person to control everything or act like their life is more important. If you live with your partner, that person should not expect you to do everything, like cleaning and paying bills. People have different ways of sharing paid and unpaid work in relationships. There is no right or wrong way, but it is important that your arrangement is discussed and agreed to by both of you.
Freedom
In relationships, you should share interests and do things together, but you should also be free to have your own friends and interests outside of the relationship.
It is not OK for your partner to stop you from seeing your friends or family, or from doing the things you want to do.
Communication
Communication is important in any relationship. No matter how often you talk to each other, it is important that you listen and be respectful. It is okay to have disagreements, but each person should feel that their views are being listened to.
Safety
Regardless of what type of relationship you are in you have the right to feel and be safe at all times.
If there is a problem, you should feel safe to talk about it, without being scared of the outcome.
Violence and abuse in relationships is never OK.
If you experience violence or abuse in a relationship you can contact 1800RESPECT for support and counselling. Call 1800 737 732 or chat to someone online (external link).
To contact 1800RESPECT via SMS, you can text ‘HELLO’ or any greeting to 0458 737 732 to start the conversation.
Signs of an unhealthy relationship
In a healthy relationship, you should feel:
- safe
- happy
- unafraid
- listened to and believed
- free to make your own decisions and choices
- supported
- allowed to ask for help
- able to live by your values.
In an unhealthy relationship, you may feel:
- bad about yourself
- isolated and unable to talk about how you feel
- anxious and depressed
- scared
- stressed
- angry
- trapped
- overwhelmed.
Tip: If you think you may be in an unhealthy relationship you can get support. Find out where to get support on the Relationships Australia website (external link).