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Saddened Explosion


Marlene Fox

A poem about accepting disability.

Content warning: This poem discusses feelings of depression and anxiety.

My heart is saddened, my head explosive
Combined they are a saddened explosion.
My mind explodes,
The tears from my heart extinguish the flames from my mind
What will become of the shell that’s left?
How do I make sense of all that’s left?
The mush that was my brain, will it ever function as it once did?
Or is this combined pulp all that is left?
Is this the only me that will ever exist again?
Tenticles reach out dragging me under.
My legs cannot run fast enough to escape their reach,
My heart cannot pump much needed blood fast enough.
How can I make it produce blood instead of tears?
How do I get answers to my Questions?
My faith is dwindling, my hope is all but gone.

If you are thinking about suicide or experiencing a personal crisis, help is available.
Call Lifeline on 13 11 14 or chat to someone online (external link).

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This story is tagged under:

Life Choices
Taking Part
Sex and Your Body
Safety and violence
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